A Piece of Me Page 3
She found herself offended by his words. She slammed back against her chair. “So, you want to have a baby with me, because you think I might be cheaper?”
“No, Amana, that’s not what I mean.” He leaned forward, his eyes filled with concern. “You are the most independent and self supporting person I know. If you have been planning to have a child on your own, then you’ve put all your ducks in a row and don’t need someone else. Which means that any man… no, me,” he corrected himself. “If I do this with you it will be a partnership.”
The cool shower of relief that rained down on her caused her to sigh; she understood where he was coming from. As a successful business man, he had to be careful. She wondered if she needed to have her head examined because she was considering the option of having sperm from a man she knew, instead of some stranger sight unseen. There was no denying she really wanted a baby, but was Neal the answer?
“I don’t know…” She shook her head and glanced away, feeling a little unsure of what to do. “We work together every day. Don’t you think this will be awkward?” She looked at him now resting back again. “What will the staff say?”
“First of all, I don’t give a damn what anyone says. We’re two adults who have been managing our lives without input from others. It’s not against company policy. Even if it was, it’s my company.”
The server chose that moment to come in to collect their dinner plates and ask if they were ready for their dessert. After being told that neither of them wanted dessert at the moment, the man left carrying the tray filled with dishes.
“If you decide to let me do this with you, I don’t plan to broadcast it in a company memo. However, neither will I hide it like something I’m ashamed of.”
That bit of knowledge warmed her heart, but she still wasn’t completely sold on the idea. She couldn’t help but voice her major fear. “When this gets out.” Lowering her gaze to her lap, she watched her own fingers play with the edge of the napkin as she attempted to put words to her emotions. “People will believe that we’ve been having a secret affair for years.”
“Amana, look at me.” Neal’s voice was gentle, yet no less commanding.
Raising her head, she peered at him across the table.
“You were a dedicated and loyal wife for years. I’m not the only one who watched you crumble after your husband lost the fight to cancer. No one who knows you will doubt your faithfulness.” His eyes were bright with compassion as his gaze and words seemed to touch her soul.
There was no one else in this world who understood her like Neal, her boss. They’d always shared a deep connection. At times, more than she and Kevin and he was her best friend. Maybe it was because of all the long hours they spent together or because they leaned on each other during the most traumatic experience in both their lives. She didn’t know the reason, and refused to dwell on why the bond was there. Kevin had seen it. Regardless of Neal’s words, others had too. In his office, buried under software projects and paperwork, he may have been oblivious to what went on around them, but she had heard a few rumors about them over the years.
She just chose to ignore them and take them for catty gossip. She had been married and Neal in a committed relationship.
“Thank you for saying that.”
“I meant it. That’s why I believe you’ll make a great mother and I want to be a part of that with you. What do you say?”
This was the moment of truth. In all the months she’d been considering her pregnancy options, she’d never thought about adding a father in the picture for her child. But, now one sat before her. Could she do this? How involved would he want to be?
“I want to make sure we both know what the expectations are. What are you offering?”
“Besides my sperm?” He wiggled his eyebrows.
She laughed at his naughty sense of humor. “Besides that. What do you want? An occasional weekend? Every other Christmas?” She didn’t want to assume that Neal Stephens, a successful business man and one of ‘The Queen City’s’ eligible bachelors, was trying to tie his life down with feedings, play dates and diaper duty.
Placing his hand on the table, palm side up, he said, “Give me your hand.”
She only hesitated a moment, then slid her hand into his and tried to ignore the electrical current sparking between their palms.
“I want it all, Amana.” He wrapped his thick fingers around hers. “I don’t want to be a part-time dad. I want to be able to keep him--”
“Or her.” She threw in.
Smiling, he confirmed, “Or her at my house over night and take them to daycare in the morning. I want to know the stress of changing stinky diapers and how much formula costs.”
“I plan to breastfeed,” she informed him. Normally, talking about her breasts would have been something on the TMI side of conversations for her, but since they were planning on co-parenting, she figured he would need to know.
He didn’t say anything, just held her gaze with his own. Slowly, she watched as his eyes lowered past her chin, drifted below her collar bone and paused at her breasts, cupped and held high by the bodice of the dress. Heat filled her body and caused her nipples to tighten and for a moment her skin tingled as if he’d caressed her.
His hand squeezed around hers. Not to the point of pain, but firm and possessive. Finally, he relaxed and his gaze returned to her face. Now, they were intense dark green eyes staring back at her.
She swallowed.
“I want to be a part of everything.”
Now she wasn’t so sure if he was trying to tell her, he even wanted to watch her breastfeed their child. That thought caused a tightening in her core, desire pooled between her legs and her clit throbbed.
Taking a deep breath, she removed her hand from his. Less contact with the sexy boss was best. Clearing her throat she said, “Let’s get the baby conceived first.” She licked her lips, her mouth feeling dry.
“It’s up to you. When do you want to do this?”
How his voice could sound so steady confounded her. “Well, I’m sure your part of it won’t be as involved as mine. They probably will run a few tests, but when all is said and done, they will just need you to fill the cup. Since you want to be a part of it all, do you mind taking fifty percent of the cost?”
Neal was silent. He sat in his chair still. If it wasn’t for the occasional blink, she would have thought he was comatose.
“N-neal?” Had she said something wrong? Maybe the mention of money had placed her in the same category as the other women who wanted financial gain from him. She hoped not. She had more than enough saved for the cost, but it would take a large chunk out of her savings and she didn’t want to have to pay it all if she didn’t have to. Ergo her reason for wanting the insurance policy amended.
“I have no intention of milking myself into a cup while watching porn, Amana.”
What? Was this whole hour’s conversation for nothing? “Then why did you say you would do it?”
“No. I said I would give you a baby. Help you conceive.”
The skin of her forehead tightened with her confusion. “Then how do you plan to…” She almost heard the bing as the light bulb came on over her head. It was becoming clear.
The arrogant tilt of Neal’s head and the lifting of a single eyebrow confirmed her thoughts. His words solidified it. “The old fashioned way.”
“You want to sleep with me?”
~YH~
Hell, yes! His mind screamed. Even if his mind still had a few doubts about whether this was the right decision, his gut was very clear on what it wanted. His cock seconded it. The thought of making love to Amana appealed to him on so many levels, it was hard for him to list them all. It wasn’t a foreign thought. There had been several times over the last year that he’d awakened with his dick hard and aching after lustful dreams of her. Erotic images of pushing up one of her hip hugging skirts and having her straddle him in his office chair. There were times he thought about her in the sexy sla
cks she wore and sliding them over her full hips and firm thighs and bending her over his desk and fucking her from behind.
It was always in his office that he took her. He just chalked it up to the fact they didn’t really see each other outside of work, unless she went with him on a business trip and even then they were spending hours in conference rooms. But the setting didn’t make the dreams any less carnal.
However, telling Amana that would freak her out even more, and she already looked as if she wanted to pick up her dress and run. So, he stayed calm and sensible about it. “Think about it like this: two people having sex has long been the most beneficial way of conceiving for eons. And it creates a better memory than you having your feet pointed to the ceiling while some doctor shoves a syringe in you.”
“There are reasons you don’t write marketing ads,” she told him. “A lot of women get pregnant from in vitro.”
“Yes, and end up with twins, triplets, quadruplets--”
She raised her hand halting his count. “I get it.”
“They also don’t always get pregnant the first time.”
“The same is true about the traditional method.”
“But it doesn’t cost you to try the first time or any additional times.” He winked at her and enjoyed seeing the color flood her soft golden brown cheeks at his meaning.
“I don’t know, Neal. It seems like we’d be taking such a big risk on so many fronts. We may not be compatible.”
“Physically?”
The air around them thickened with the thought of feeling her sex conform to his penis. His breathing became slightly laborious.
She rubbed the side of her neck. “Genetically.”
“We both know that we are.” He patted his side where her kidney rested inside of him.
“Well, what about work, family, our friendship...” she sighed. “We could be jeopardizing all of that.”
He leaned forward, resting his weight on both his forearms. “As long as you promise to respect me the morning after we do this, I’m good.”
She pressed her palm against her forehead. “How can you be so calm, so blasé about this?”
“Because it’s you, Amana.” He looked into her face, locking his gaze on her dark brown eyes. “I may have second and third issues with any other woman. But, with you none.” He paused, allowing the weight of his words to sink in. “You did a selfless act for me and didn’t think twice about it. Or if you did, still went through with it regardless of the risks associated with it; which is a hell of a lot greater than people gossiping about us.”
Turning away from him, she stared out the door towards the guests in the main area of the restaurant. Then her gaze lowered to her lap for a while. He could see the various emotions playing across her face and in her posture. She went from tense to relaxed, to her face contorting, a mirror of her internal struggles.
The long silence began to weigh on him and he started to wonder if there was another issue between them. One that was truly keeping her from agreeing. Was it possible she is not attracted to me? That the sexual tension between us over the last two years has only been one sided?
“Is it sleeping with me that’s the problem, Amana?” He waited, dreading her reply. “You’d perhaps prefer someone else?”
Slowly, she raised her head and he could see the passion in her gaze, making her eyes appear more black than brown. Maybe like him, her mind had been playing images of the two of them making love, their nude bodies fitted perfectly against each other.
“No. There’s no one else I’d trust to do this with me other than you.”
He almost passed out with the force of the relief that rocked his soul. “That’s good to know.” He gave her a small smile and she returned it. Holding both his hands out to her, he said, “We’ll do this as friends.”
“Friends.” She nodded and placed her hands in his.
Lifting one hand, he kissed the back of her fingers and felt her slight tremor before he pulled away.
“When do you think we should do this?”
How could he say tonight would be a great time to start without sounding like a randy teenage boy? Not to mention, he’d have a hard time convincing her to have sex if it wasn’t going to be beneficial to procreation. “I guess it all depends on when you’re fertile or ovulating, whichever.”
“It’s pretty much both of those.”
“I guess you’ll need to start the fun game of tracking and calculating.” He would have thought it would feel weird discussing such a personal and intimate topic with her, but it didn’t.
“I’ve already been doing that for the last three months since I started this process.”
His Amana, the planner, attention to detail was a must. “So, when’s the egg at prime target,” he jested attempting to keep the mood light. Anything to keep Amana from getting that concerned look on her face again and change her mind. Lifting his water glass, he drank liberally from it, needing to cool down since his body’s temperature had spiked since it was determined that he would be bedding his assistant.
“Today or possibly tomorrow.”
He had to swallow hard, forcing the mouthful of water down his throat so he wouldn’t spit it across the room and embarrass himself. Quickly, he set the glass down and picked up his napkin, wiping his mouth to ensure he wasn’t dribbling. As he held the cloth to his mouth and cleared his throat, the server entered.
“Are you all ready for dessert, now?”
Neal never glanced at the man standing beside their table. Instead he kept his gaze fixed on the beautiful woman before him. The knowledge that at this moment, her body was ready for him, prepared to receive his seed and possibly create a new life had him quaking with need. He felt animalistic like he wanted to stand up and prowl around her, growling and warn other men away from her. From what was his.
Only for a night, his mind reminded him. But, his body didn’t care. One night in heaven with Amana would give him a lifetime of memories and hopefully a strong healthy child.
Aware of the server patiently waiting, Neal reached into his pocket and pulled out his wallet. Still keeping his eyes on the desirable woman across from him, he removed his credit card and he held it out to the man and said, “Check, please, now.”
“As you wish.” The man turned and exited the room.
“Are you sure you want to do this tonight, Neal?” she asked. “I don’t want you to feel pressured or rushed.”
Hell yes, he felt rushed, by his own body. And there couldn’t be any more pressure than the insistent throbbing of his cock in his pants. “Would you rather wait until the next cycle?”
Amana’s chest rose and fell with one shuddered breath after another. He had no doubt that she wanted him just as much as he wanted her.
“No. I’ll have the joy of being a month along or planning for the next try.”
As much as he would like to have the chance to have sex with her again, he wanted to give her the baby she desired more. He would just have to be content with this one night.
“So, do you want to do this at your place or mine?”
Shaking her head, she said, “I think we should keep this like a business arrangement. I think being at either one of our homes makes it too personal.”
His chuckle was dry. Only Amana would think that the place they had sex would keep it on a “clinical” level. “We’ll be having sex, sweetheart, it doesn’t get any more personal than that.”
“Still, I think a hotel is best. Tomorrow we go to our own homes and play the waiting game for the next two weeks.” She haphazardly folded her napkin and placed it on top of the table.
“However you want it.”
The server returned. Neal added a substantial tip, signed and stood up as he re-pocketed his card. Stepping to the side, he held his elbow out to her. “If you’re ready.”
There was no need for anything more to be stated.
“I’m ready.”
The other man slid Amana’s chair back and she
rose. Moving to Neal, she encircled his elbow. Reaching up, he cupped her cheek, caressing her soft skin. Lowering his hand, he led her out of the restaurant the same way he brought her in. However, he knew that two hours ago they had entered as friends, now they were exiting as lovers.
Chapter 4
“You haven’t changed your mind have you, Amana?” Neal could feel her body trembling against his as they stood inside their suite at the Westin. He held her shoulder and stared into her eyes, clouded with shadows, but no fear that he could see.
“No.” She placed a hand in the center of his chest. “Just a little nervous that’s all.”
He could understand that, he found his own body quaking a little internally. Not because he was having second thoughts about being with her, more to the point he wanted the night to be perfect. A memorable experience for her and one she would think fondly about when she was holding their child.
“Would you like me to order up some wine or something?”
“I think I’ve had enough tonight.” She stepped away from him, moving deeper into the room and towards the window that over looked the city--bright and vibrant.
He observed her as she stood there in the soft lamp glow. The room was still dim for the most part, only one light on next to the king-size bed, which had already been turned down for the night. He took a few breaths calming himself, not wanting to rush the moment.
His driver, Dan, had brought them here. In the back of his car, they sat silently holding hands, both of them gazing out of opposite windows with an occasional glance towards each other. Dan would ensure Amana’s car was moved from the restaurant to the hotel parking garage.
Now, he stared at her. The hairstylist had pinned her thick tresses on top of Amana’s head giving her a few curls hanging down. Normally he preferred her hair down around her shoulders. However, tonight it was perfect, because it left the smooth golden brown expanse of her back revealed around the two straps. He had the urge to kiss every inch of it, from her shoulders to the small of her back, licking up her spine.
Crossing the room, he came up behind her and lightly caressed her shoulder and was captivated by the warm, silky texture of her skin. It wasn’t as if he’d never touched her hand before, but this, this touch spoke of the intimacy they would share before the night was done.